We were just sitting around the living room, staring into computer screens and absently eating from aluminum take-out boxes — in short: minding our own business — when the cat brushed his tail into a candle and promptly burst into flames. “Jack’s on fire!” Jurvis shouted. I sat on the couch, a forkful of drunken [...]
You know what I’ve never had before, in my life? Striped socks. I kid you not. I’d always thought patterns on socks were just kind of . . . wrong. I think I’m in love. I got all kinds of lovely, thoughtful things for Christmas, but so far this pair of socks has garnered the [...]
It seems like any time I need to walk somewhere, I pass the same basketball court. I don’t even know what street it’s on: I just look to my right, and there it is again, always empty and pristine. It’s surrounded by a chain link fence and glows with dim, yellow light at night. You [...]
Ladies and gentlemen, for your consideration I present Exhibit A: “what we chant at the beginning of yoga class every week” (as translated from the Sanskrit), or, “further evidence of my growing insanity”: I bow to the lotus feet of the guru who awakens insight into the happiness of pure Being who is the refuge, [...]
The first time I got into trouble with the cops, I was wearing nothing but a damp towel and some sand. The sheriff’s jeep had come bumbling down the hill toward the lake, brights on, stupidly indignant. “You kids know it’s illegal to skinny dip in public? I could arrest you right now. Is that [...]