© 2008 Adrianne

How To React In an Emergency

We were just sitting around the living room, staring into computer screens and absently eating from aluminum take-out boxes — in short: minding our own business — when the cat brushed his tail into a candle and promptly burst into flames.

“Jack’s on fire!” Jurvis shouted.

I sat on the couch, a forkful of drunken noodles frozen in front of my mouth, watching as our blazing kitty ran towards the windows. We’re always yelling at him when he jumps on the table, and he knows that the windows, with their long gauze curtains, are a proper sanctuary. He’s allowed in the windowsills.

Well, now the curtains are on fire, I thought. The flames are crawling upwards and licking the ceiling. The entire apartment is burning down, and you haven’t even registered it yet. What will you save? Laptop? Camera? Striped socks? What will it be like to lose everything? To escape tragedy? Will you need the emergency ladder, stashed under the bed? Do you even know exactly where that is?

“I got him,” Jurvis was saying, face smooshed against the windowsill with the cat smothered in his arms. Jack — never one to be tackled, patted down, or generally prohibited from movement — mewed plaintively in his grasp, and the entire room reeked of smoke and scorched fur.

“Oh,” I said. “Hey, uh, good.”

But part of me still thought I was standing outside right then, covered in charcoal smudges and gazing upwards.

7 Comments

  1. Posted January 22, 2008 at 2:28 pm | #

    Also, if my kitty burned down my house, I would be pretty mad at him, even if he gave me those big round kitty eyes.

  2. dahd
    Posted January 23, 2008 at 1:36 pm | #

    Where’s your camera when you need it?

  3. Adrianne
    Posted January 23, 2008 at 1:44 pm | #

    I like to think he was making this particular expression.

  4. ami
    Posted January 23, 2008 at 11:28 pm | #

    is he okay?

  5. Adrianne
    Posted January 24, 2008 at 12:23 am | #

    Right as rain, and back to playing with fire.

  6. Adrianne
    Posted January 24, 2008 at 11:49 am | #

    Update: my dad photoshops a picture of Jack, to help you visualize.

  7. dahd
    Posted January 24, 2008 at 12:29 pm | #

    I really gotta get a day job.

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